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Creating Bridges: Spirituality & Philosophy:
Water For The Dry Sponge
Chronicles and Essays
By Shaun Brown:
“The Beach”
How Will Yours Look In Future?
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by Shaun Brown |
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The correlation between the choices you make in life and how your life turns out is not news. Gary Zukav, the author of “Seat Of The Soul,” states that you change your life one choice at a time.
On some level, because you have chosen to arrive on this Earth, you have chosen to do, “The Beach.” By that I mean life on life’s’ terms, while still trying to accomplish your mission. When you decide to overcome the challenges that have been placed before you in this life~ you become a stronger, more loving human being and the view of the beach is beautiful. The goal is to share your gifts and give back what you have learned so that your life and the lives of those you touch will thrive.
Once you are born into this plane of existence you have arrived, so to speak. Stepping onto the beach, just as the ink dries on the dotted line of your contract. The one that states you are going learn your lessons and be of Service. So wear a good pair of flip-flops as you ready for your destiny!
The question is: will you choose to dance on the beach or you will be drug on the beach with every passing wave of tide? The first clue I can give you is: pain is optional. Remember this was an agreement you made on a Spiritual level to do service through the openness of your heart. As long as you understand the rules of this concept, life can be rich and full. A playland to mold and change and experience with excitement and joy!
The other alternative is to be drug on the beach. You embrace the constant taste of gritty sand in your teeth as you do a constant face plant in the sand. When presented with challenges or obstacles how do you perceive them? Are you always looking for the answers outside of you? Are you a ‘P’ or and ‘S’? Meaning, are you the Problem or the Solution? Do you find yourself whining about what your beach looks like, being a victim, and judging the way you think life “should” look. Do you have a God that will punish you if you move out of the box? Which, by the way, is only a perception.
Some of us try to control outcomes, well most of us. Somehow we think it makes us feel safe if we force what life is supposed to look like. This stringent tact usually ends up in, yet another pile of, doodoo. Until we make the conscious effort to stand upright and ask for Guidance, this can almost feel like the permanent press cycle of your dryer. Here we are again, and again, and again.
Being drug on the beach can seem so familiar to some that they have a permanent rash. My career of being drug on the beach lasted until my mid-life. I was raised a victim and by golly I was determined to carry on the family tradition! The tradition that states, “Everybody is out to get me, don’t risk, the world is not safe.” (Part of being a victim is blaming the family)
I saw everyone as a problem and God was not co-operating with my plans either. I attached myself to Alpha men most of the time and sometimes not. My modus operandi was to think I could control them behind the scenes. At one point I thought one of my husbands loved me so much he tried to run me down with his truck! I was living on the beach face down. There was no end in sight with my self-centered manipulating, dishonest being. In other words, like most people, I was in the survival mode. What can I get from you and how fast. This life style can also be referred to as bushwhacking.
This is a perfect picture of someone just starting on a Spiritual path that has not yet learned or is just learning to change their view from “Why me?” to “Thank God it’s me.” To “see” these storms as gifts. It certainly doesn’t seem like it at the time but these gifts of wisdom will lead you to a strong Inner self, and a place of Peace. Not that anyone should be run down by a truck, but that message for me was to stop choosing partners for power and gain your own.
Inner Peace is earned by choices that go toward the Light one step at a time, your Self will be stretched and you will learn patience too. When you have arrived at this place you will share what you know with others-freely. The critical shift from dragging to dancing is getting connected to your Higher Power. Meditate and Pray for Guidance every morning and then listen.
Vampires du jour?
This is where the part about getting rid of the “sucky”, needy, “vampires” come in. A friend of mine asked me, “How do I get rid of a “sucky,” needy, “vampire?” Now remember, “vampires” are choosing this role due to their belief systems. Usually, they fear change, they have a punishing God that they don’t want to get close to and are slothful~ they lack discipline.
When you have chosen to be involved with a “vampire,” (and remember they are there to teach you to choose boundaries for yourself) and you want them out of your life, all you need to say is how you are feeling. This is about you, isn’t it always?
You will need to practice in the mirror or role play with a safe person, but get used to taking care of yourself by putting a boundary down. If your “vampire” is an acquaintance, because this is not the definition of a friend, one can say this, “I don’t feel grounded, I feel as if I need to really work on my Inner self for awhile, and I am taking a break from our connection.” Wow, how does that feel? If this feels kinda scary, you are going in the right direction!
Now if your “vampire” is a client, this process is easier. You send them a letter explaining that you feel you can no longer serve them and that you can no longer be their therapist. (The only reason you would keep them around is to keep taking their money and continue resentments toward them. This is because you are not taking care of your Self). If you want to let them go in person you can say, “I really care for you, and must let you go. The therapy that I provide is not serving your needs. We are just not a match.” Zip it!
You don’t get paid enough to therapize in the area that they really need help in. Do not suggest another therapist. It would be rude to send someone else a problem. When they try to hook into more dialogue, repeat the sentence again. That’s it. Zip it! Say no more. It will feel uncomfortable the first few times, after that it will feel like you are spending your time in a more productive way, and taking care of yourself. Move on.
The key to serenity is facing fears, challenges and understanding what those elements have to teach us. Once you have learned the lesson it will disappear. Just like the “vampire,” once you thank them for teaching you boundaries and becoming strong in your truth, to stand up for yourself, those “vampires” just magically disappear. They disappear because it is just an illusion brought to you by the Universe. This challenge gives you the chance to walk through it or run from it. To become strong or put that experience on hold. If you run from it, not to worry, you will have the opportunity to be faced with it again. And again, and again!
This can be perceived as a problem, but it also can be perceived as a wonderful opportunity to grow and learn and be a stronger human being. You stand in the Truth that you are a spark of God. What else are you here for? I don’t think, “The one that dies with the most toys” is even close to being in the Spiritual Evolution Game!
I had always wanted to be in contact with God, but it was the way I wanted God to act. I used the various “altered” substances to try to attain that. Short term gains with long term pain along the way. My results were futile and as I continued to struggle through life, by being a train wreck my Spiritual juice glass was always empty. I took no measure to really connect with my Inner world and do my Inner work.
I reached a point of desperation, a place that Caroline Myss calls “dark night of the soul.” The place in your Inner being that aches to be free and sometimes just aches. There is a greater plan here that is not being fulfilled. You “KNOW” it. You can no longer go on in the hot, dry dessert, without juice. The timer has gone off, the rubber has met the road, and the bank is rupt. It is time to honor your contract. Remember? The contract that states you are here to learn your lessons while being of Service?
Once you have changed your “perception” of how you see the beach and have chosen to connect to a Power greater than yourself, you realize, in that moment of clarity, that you are the beach! You are a constant, unchanging, solid core of Being. God shows you how to become familiar with your life’s rhythms. In those rhythms you will notice that the beach remains the same, some sand may shift, but the only thing that changes is the weather around the beach, not the beach itself.
As you become more aware of the weather as an observer and separate from it, adjustments can be made to stay grounded. Now that you are connected and guided you can be somewhat peaceful even though storms will come. You are in for a wonderful life changing experience, orchestrated just for the development of your Soul!
Your Soul is asking you to become a Spiritual adult~ it’s time to meet the agreements you committed to before you were born. I hated this part, feeling like I had to start taking responsibility for the choices I had made. I also found it refreshing that at least there was a solution. I could finally lift my face out of the sand. Healthy choices started becoming the norm and my life started becoming fabulous!
You see life is choices. Each small choice, whether it is crème cheese on that bagel or not, redesigns, in that choice, what the next choice will be. This is really good news, but it can feel uncomfortable at first. Anything new feels not comfortable. Just like starting to play an instrument, it takes time and dedication.
Once you “sweep the beach,” that is, get rid of the unhealthy parts of your Inner and outer life, by one choice at a time, this is the beginning of really trusting that the Universe has a plan for you and that this orchestrated plan was designed for your best interest.
Develop healthy boundaries. Be an example of compassion, strength and courage. One meditation at a time. One challenging choice at a time. Building your foundation with God. You will speak to others without talking. This is priceless and can only be achieved by Inner work.
Imagine that? The weather on the beach changed, as I changed my “perception” from poor me to lucky me. Unless you like the feeling of perpetual road rash and picking sand from your teeth, you can learn to love yourself. Dancing on the beach can become preferable, very comfortable and much more fun. Remember, your needs will always be met and much, much, more! Hopefully, by your lead, the world will be a better place. It starts with one beach at a time. Love to you.
Until next time~
BeWell!
Shaun
BeWellPublications.com |
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Shaun Brown,
Author, Speaker,
Columnist
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Shaun Brown has been self employed most of her adult life. She has an AA degree in General Business and a Bachelor of Arts Degree from California State University, Sacramento, in Communications.
Her main focus of education is in advertising, promotion and production. Ms. Brown began writing music 1971 and has continued to unfold as a writer in many other directions since that time.
Her best selling book is based on the course: "Create A Successful Holistic Business." She has authored two books on the subject and is actively involved in teaching workshops in N. California. Her holistic business articles are published in several national holistic magazines, and she has a successful holistic practice in Orangevale, California.
To find out more about Shaun’s books and workshops visit her on-line at
www.BeWellPublicatons.
com.
BeWell!
Shaun Brown
BeWellPublications.com
916) 988-4322
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